Coming back home
by rMary
Summary: Soldier of the ninth division of the American army, Quinn Fabray comes back home without knowing that a pleasant surprise who goes by the name of Rachel Berry awaits for her. Faberry - AU
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Glee does not belong to me, and their characters also do not belong to me (unfortunately), they belong to auntie Ryan Murphy and FOX (snif snif). The text in bold are flashbacks and italics are thoughts. **

**Hey everyone! I wrote this fanfic originally in portuguese (since I'm Portuguese) and posted it here on ff, it is already completed and has eight chapters. But then a friend of mine convinced me to post it in English and here I am. If someone wants to read the portuguese version just go to my profile. I sincerely hope you enjoy this history because this is my first faberry fic. The chapters are a little bit large, so I'll post only one chapter per week, still don't know the right day but I'll let you guys know as soon as I can. Also, I hope you'll forgive me for possible ortographic and gramatical errors, and let me know if it is something really serious, my English is not 100% :) **

**Anddd... I would appreciate it if someone would volunteer to be my beta reader. That's it. Nice reading :)**

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**Chapter one**

I heard shots, saw bodies piled on the floor and blood dripping down my hands before opening my frightened eyes. My first reflex was to look for my rifle hanging on my left shoulder. But I sighed in relief for not have found it. In place of the rifle was my little bag with the few belongings I had, I clung more to him and blinked a few times to get rid of the haze in my eyes and be able to observe better in the darkness.

The truck bounced violently and caused me cold chills even though I was wearing two layers of clothing and a jacket emblazoned with the American flag on my left breast. I felt the wound on my backs burning and although nurse Beiste had done a bandage on it I still felt a lot of pain and mostly very discomfort. I lost count of how many hours I was already sitting in the same position within the small truck with over twelve other women. I glanced quickly through the place, unable to really see anything because of the darkness that reigned. I stretched a hand and lifted the cloth that covered the body of the truck and observed the sky full of stars before he began to clear.

I sighed and went back quietly to close the cloth. It had been a long time since I saw the sunrise without worrying myself about whether I'd be or not alive to see it the next time.

I didn't closed my eyes anymore for the rest of the night. I knew if I did it I would be risking waking up startled and frightened because of the nightmares that tormented my sleep.

"Don't you sleep?" I heard one of the women whisper to me. Although I wasn't seeing her because of the darkness I turned to where I thought she was.

"I am not sleepy." Was my short answer.

"Why? Aren't you happy? You're going home now." She kept whispering. I wasn't really in the mood to start a conversation at the moment, I just wanted to be alone and preferably in silence, but something about that woman made me continue whispering to her.

"That's not it..." I sighed heavily and suddenly felt a twinge of pain. "I'm just ... tired."

"I'm also tired. I think I'm missing home." She replied and I felt her getting closer to me, her right shoulder leaning on my left one. "It's been two years that I don't see my mom and my fiancé Jake. I miss them a lot, I couldn't wait to end this damn war and to return home. Ok, the war isn't over completely, but at least we're going home."

I stiffened when I first heard that word.

Home.

She didn't notice or didn't want to notice my displeasure, I don't really know if she was paying any attention to me as she spoke. I was scared when I felt her hot breath hit my neck, just below my left ear.

"And you? Don't you miss home?"

I closed my eyes and bit my lower lip. My hand went to the small pendant in the shape of a butterfly hanging on my neck and I squeezed it tightly before swallowing the tears.

"I don't have one anymore."

"Oh."

She pulled back a bit from me and seemed to reflect for a moment, making only the roar of the old engine being heard. When I was about to give up and risking to close my eyes for just a moment, I felt her approaching again against my neck.

"What is your name?"

"Fabray. Soldier of ninth division, Quinn Fabray." I replied a little bit more controlled.

"Nice to meet you, Quinn. I'm Marley, soldier of the seventeenth division." I felt her squeeze my arm lightly and I could swear I saw her smiling in the middle of the darkness.

I can't say exactly how long we remained seated and traveling without major stops. I found in Marley a pleasant company to kill time and to camouflage the pain that I felt by being seated on the same position for hours.

"Where are we now?" Marley asked me trying to lift the cloth.

"I don't know, but I think we are close to Bridgeport." I replied tilting my head back and supporting her in the plating. "I think I'll stay there."

"Why will you stay in Connecticut? Do you know anyone there?"

I smiled realizing the curiosity in her voice. "No, I don't know anyone in Connecticut. But it's the closest place to Ohio that we'll stop and I need to go to Lima, my mother lived there. And I also ... before being called to the army."

"Okay then. Wish you luck to find her. "

"Thank you." I thanked her sincerely although I knew it wouldn't find her anymore. "And you?"

"Hmm ... I'll stay in Delaware. How long is your license?"

"Four months, but if everything goes well ... I hope it all ends soon so I no longer have to go back there." I gasped as I remembered all of the battlefields that I've been. "And you? Will you come back or...?"

"My license is three months, but I also hope this war ends before my license ends. And maybe one day we'll meet again Quinn. I enjoyed meeting you."

"Me too."

The next day I was coming down from the truck in Stratford, a small village in Bridgeport with my little bag hanging on my back as I was still wearing the uniform of the U.S. Army, it didn't take long to find the train station and buy a ticket to Lima with the little money that was given to me as soon as I got out the secret camp in Eichewalde, a small town that was about 23 km away from Berlin in Germany. As soon as I got my ticket I searched for the train that would take me to Lima and I settled myself in the place indicated on the ticket. I was tired and just wanted a good clean and soft bed to lie down, but I feared that I couldn't enjoy the bed for a long time because of the nightmares.

When you're in a war, you see things that you'd never would like to see in your entire life. You learn to appreciate life and learn to live your minutes as if they were the last ones and how to prepare yourself to face death at any time of the day despite how much you want to escape from it. Then if it´s not you it'll be your friends and your partners. You'll see them die in your arms helplessly except being there holding their hands and listening to their last requests. Just as I did. And they were so many. Wilde, Jones, Zizes, Lopez...

I opened my eyes scared when I felt a hand shaking me by the shoulders. The sun streamed through the windows indicating that it was already day. I slept all night. And the nightmares were still there.

"Hey girl, will you not come down?"

"Huh? Are we there yet?" I muttered stunned, looking at the man that would probably be the driver, he had many whitish hair and I would risk myself to say that he was staring at me a little upset.

"Half an hour ago, girl. I need you to leave, the next passengers are already coming and if you want to return to Bridgeport just buy a return ticket." He pointed to the ticket office in the train.

I apologized and thanked him warmly, grabbed my bag and hung it on my back. I left the train. I felt a little discomfort because of the injury that was burning in my back, but I clenched my teeth and decided to ignore the pain. When coming down the few rungs of the train I felt the morning breeze hit my face and I took a deep breath, holding once again the urge to cry for being able to enjoy a moment of peace like that without listening gunshots, screams, orders, and explosions... deaths.

I didn't know if I still remembered the way back home. But I think that I could never forget it, I spent my entire childhood and almost half of my youth in that place. I walked on the train station through the crowd, some leaving and others, like me, arriving. Some of them receiving their families, husbands, sons, daughters, wives... others simply saying their goodbyes with their looks, hugs and tears in a silent promise that they would return one day. But sometimes we can't always fulfill everything we promise.

I stopped in front of a white and yellow house, the typical houses of American families. The yard wasn't very big but it had a generous space covered with grass. A small swing creaked between two old shady trees of which I remembered perfectly. The memories of the day my father set up the swing were present in my mind. I remembered perfectly. I closed my eyes and the scene appeared clearly in my mind.

**_It was Christmas time. I ran across the grass in my yellow Sunday dress, the one I always wore to go to church with my parents. My older sister was shaking her head and my mother Judy was screaming loudly for me to stop running or I would mess up the dress. I remember being so excited for being able to walk on the swing that my father had promised to build as a Christmas present for me and Frannie. As soon as he announced he had just set up the swing I ran to him and hugged him. He then put me over the seat and was pushing me slowly. My mother called him to say something and he pulled away from me, it was when I started to gain momentum and unintentionally my hands slipped from the support and I was projected forward with all speed, immediately falling on the ground screaming in pain. My parents came running to me and my mother almost had a heart attack when she saw all the blood running down my forehead. I broke my left arm, took five points on the forehead and my mother forbade me to swing for at least two months until my wounds stay better._**

I opened my eyes slowly and realized that everything had been nothing but past memories. I looked across the place a little lost and then realized a very beautiful garden that framed the front of the house and the mixtures of the flowers colors captured my attention for a brief moment. But it weren't just they that captured my attention. What most caught my attention was the fact that they were alive and seemed to be well cared for and trimmed. I found it odd, because I knew that who always took care of the house garden was my mother. I hoped at least to find it empty since my mother was no longer living there. Seven months after being called in the army, I was still in a camp in Lyon in France before I left to Germany. I received a letter from a neighbor who was also my mother's friend declaring she had passed away.

The only reason that made me want to keep living had vanished. I wondered then, why to keep on fighting? Why keep fighting to live if I no longer had where to come back when everything were over? While others were praying to stay alive, to return to their families and their lovers, I was praying for a bullet to hit me soon. I didn't feel worthy to be alive if I had nowhere to return after the war, I didn't had where to hold myself on, only on the memories of what once were a happy family. Everyone was gone and left me alone... First it came the car accident and Frannie and my father were gone. Then it was my mother with the heart attack.

It was too much to handle alone until I meet an extroverted and cheerful Latin girl who stayed by my side and supported my pain and within the space of about three months Santana Lopez and I could consider ourselves sisters for life. Until she was also gone and left me all alone again.

I straightened myself better and opened the little white wooden door. I approached the entrance and then I climbed the small wooden steps leading to the small porch. I stopped in front of the oak door and then I gave it three followed knocks. I felt a twinge of pain hit me and then I put a hand on my back trying to stop it.

A redhead woman opened the door.

"Good morning." She said.

"Good morning." I replied, not knowing what to do. Who was that woman? "Umm ... I'm looking for Miss Holly Holliday."

"Oh. Okay. Miss Holliday is no longer living here in Lima. She moved to Michigan." She told me blinking excessively.

I was confused. What did she mean with 'she moved'?

"She moved?"

"Yes, she did moved. It wasn't long ago, just a few months ago. I am also new here. My name is Emma Pillsbury-Schuester. "

"I am Quinn." I held out my hand politely. I saw her looking at my hand with a frown, then she looked at me and smiled as if she hadn't just left me embarrassed with my hand in the air.

"She is your aunt?"

"Uh? Who? "

"Holly. She is your aunt? "

"Uh ... let's say she is." I lied feeling my cheeks grow warm.

"Oh, ok. My husband and I just moved in, we are a newly married couple. Holly made us a good price for the house and William didn't refuse the offer. But tell me, don't you want to come in a little?"

"No, thank you." I replied feeling her eyes evaluating me from my head to my toes. I felt a discomfort, but I soon tried to hide it. "She sold the house to you?"

"She sold."

"But ..." **_it was my mother's house_**, that's what I wanted to say, but I controlled myself in time. "And you, by any chance, don't have her address?"

"No, she didn't said exactly where she would be staying in Michigan."

**_Damn it!_** I thought frustrated. I couldn't believe she had been able to sell the house that was once from my parents and that was mine by right!

In the letter I had received from Holly, she had said that she would take care of the house until the war was over and I was back home. I had no family who lived close enough to take care of the house and I didn't really had many choices, so I agreed with what she proposed me. I thought she really wanted to help, but Holly Holliday was nothing but a cheater who posed as a friend of my mother just to steal her house.

"It's okay, thank you. Goodbye, Mrs. Schuester." I said, conformed, turning my back to the woman not really waiting a response from her. But then I remembered something and turned around before she could close the door. "Mrs. Schuester? Can I ask you one more thing? "

"Sure, whatever you want." She smiled kindly.

"What did she say when she sold the house to you? I mean, Miss Holliday?"

"Umm ... she said she was with some family issues and that she would move to Michigan. She also said that a friend asked her to sell the house to her and showed a power of attorney on behalf of her friend, if I am not mistaken the woman's name was Judy. Judy ..."

I felt my heart race at the mention of my mother's name.

"Fabray? Judy Fabray?"

"Yes, yes, that was her name, I remember now. Judy Fabray. But why are you asking?" She frowned.

"Nothing. Just curiosity ... I think." I lied squeezing the bag in my backs. "Well then... thank you, Miss Schuester."

"You're welcome, Quinn. Come back often, I hope you find your aunt!" She waved me before closing the oak door."

I opened the wood door and left the yard. I sat on the sidewalk a little far away from the house and stayed there for several minutes. Had no other place to stay, another problem to be added to my long list of problems. **_Hey, at least you're still alive and with all your members in place,_** I thought sarcastically.

The hours went by and I still sat looking at my former house without knowing what to do and with many questions in my head. Where had arranged a power of attorney signed by my mother? It could only be falsified! My mother would never leave our house in the hands of a strange person. She knew that I would come back alive. She always told me so. That we had to believe before things happen.

I saw the sun set with certain desperation. I didn't had nowhere to go. Didn't had much money and it was barely enough to buy a ticket back to Bridgeport, so, basically, I didn't know what to do. I felt like a prisoner released several years after without knowing what to do or even where to go. Four years away from home weren't a small thing, and although it seemed slightly, the changes weren't few.

When I felt the cold hit my bones I pulled out a khaki jacket inside my bag and put it in the hope that he would keep me warm. But it didn't take long for me to realize that I would need a place to spend the night and maybe think about what to do the next day. I was also very hungry. For nearly two days I didn't put anything in my stomach. I pulled out the money I had left and I sighed when I saw how little it was. I stood up some time later and started looking for a restaurant nearby, one that would grant me something to eat with seven dollars and forty-five cents. After a good few minutes walking in the cold night with my bag on my back, feeling cold, thirsty, hungry and extremely tired, I spotted a small restaurant called Breadstix. I went in and sat down in one of the round tables and waited for the waitress to come bring me the menu. Once I opened it I shrank back while reading the prices. Everything I was able to pay was a cup of coffee and some toasts, and even then I found the best meal of my life. In the army we didn't ate breakfast and they didn't gave us barred warm toasts with butter, only canned food and everything we could get in our backpacks.

For the first time at the day I looked at a clock, one that was attached on the wall behind the counter and I saw that it was already past 10 pm. A few hours later the restaurant had to close and I found myself aimlessly again. On impulse, I went again to the train station. I knew that the train stations were always open because new trains always arrived every moment. I slept sitting and clutching at my bag, leaning against one of the pillars that supported the rail structure.

I woke up panting and with the sun hitting straight into my face. I looked around and realized I was still in Lima train station and that everything had not passed of another nightmare. When I wanted to get myself up, a few coins fell from my khaki jacket that was in my lap. I was confused with the coins because I had spent everything I had on the coffee and the toasts the night before. Still, I picked up the coins and counted exactly seven dollars. I furrowed my brow in confusion. How those coins ended up in my coat?

It was when I saw a chubby lady passing by my side and depositing a coin in my coat which was on the floor beside me. I looked at her in disbelief, but she didn't noticed me and kept walking away. Tears came to my eyes while I was still looking in the direction that the chubby lady had disappeared. I felt a deep sadness take care of me and lowered my head unable to do anything, feeling really useless and worthless. Didn't blame people for thinking that I was begging for coins. I let them put as many as they wanted to. At the end of the day I gathered all the coins and managed to join a good twenty-three dollars and eighteen cents. I ran to Breadstix and ate a real meal. I saved part of the money for the next day and therefore, a week passed by like this.

I washed myself and washed the few clothes I had in the bathroom of the train station. I ripped some pieces of an old shirt I had and cleaned my wound every day, but I always felt a lot of pain when I tried to stretch my arm and sometimes I couldn't reach into the wound because of the pain. It wasn't like taking a real bath, but it was what I had at the time. When we were in combat sometimes we stayed days without a drop of water to take a bath. That was war, there was no time to worry about showering or something like that, and when we had a few opportunities we used to wash ourselves in the few rivers we found and that was it. There, it prevailed the famous adage "kill to not be killed."

Supplies, medicines and food were the most important, they only came in second plan. The first plan was to stay alive until the next day and so on.

I woke up sore on the second week sleeping on the train station. It was Tuesday and the movement in the train station was intense. I didn't know what was happening, but I noticed that the place was more crowded than usual. I planned to gather a little more money and maybe go to New York and try a new life, had heard that the city at the time was the city of opportunities and I couldn't pass an opportunity even though I wasn't sure if she really existed or not. As usual, I went wash myself in the bathroom of the train station then I came back and sat in the same place that I had been sleeping for nearly two weeks. It was when I suddenly heard shouting.

I saw people giving way to a little blond tornado that ran desperate and I also saw a small brunette figure shouting that the little boy had stolen her purse. I saw him go flying in front of me and I also saw the purse he was holding on so tightly in his clumsy escape. I didn't think twice before getting up and running after him with everything I had. The boy gave me some trouble, because besides being shorter than me he was able to run faster and was dodging people like a thunderbolt, I almost lost sight of him. He ran toward the exit doors of the train station and I ran after him like a crazy woman. Actually it wasn't so hard to catch him, as Sue Sylvester would usually say "nobody walks in the army, everyone runs" and in the middle of a war we had to run even more, but despite that he still managed to leave me tired for its efforts.

At a certain moment I fell on top of him and we rolled on the floor near the doors. In one second I was up and was holding him by the collar of the white shirt stuck in his pants by a pair of brown suspenders.

"Hey! What are you doing?" He yelled trying to let go of my hands.

"Did you know that taking things that don't belong to you is wrong?" I said calmly, putting him on the ground and taking the purse from his hands.

"You are not my mother!"

"Of course not! And if I were, you'd be done!"

"Let me go!" He tried to run, but I caught him by the arm and didn't let him go.

"Hey, wait a minute. What is your name?"

"Why do you want to know my name?"

"Besides stealing badly you're still stubborn! I asked what your name is!" I said sharply, shaking him. He looked at me frightened.

"My name is Sam. There, I already told you. Can you let me go now?"

"Why were you stealing this, Sam?" I showed him the purse. Some people stopped to watch the scene and I was honestly giving a damn about them.

"I already told you that you are not my mother!"

"Spill, little boy!"

"Ugh." He grunted annoyed and rolled his eyes. I noticed his big mouth and for a moment I wanted to laugh at his little frustrated face.

"Will you talk or not? If you tell me why I will let you go."

"Ok, ok. I was stealing to buy something for me and my sister Britt eat. We didn't eat anything since yesterday and our mother disappeared when I was six, so I have to take care of her. Kind of a chef of family, you understand? Satisfied now? Can you let me go now?"

"Is that true?" I asked suspiciously.

"Why would I lie to you?"

"Perhaps to make me let you go!?" I raised an eyebrow and then felt him shrink again.

"Well, but I'm not."

I ran the place quickly with my eyes and then I looked at the little boy. He had his head bowed slightly and looked frightened at the people who approached us. He shouldn't have more than eleven years.

I sighed. "Okay, I believe you. Here. Take this." I took a few coins from my pocket and placed them in his hands. He looked at me suspiciously, but once he saw the coins he didn't think twice before accepting them. "Take these coins and buy something so that you and your sister may eat." He was already putting them in his pocket when I grabbed his little arm. "But you'll have to promise me you'll not steal again, Sam."

"Ok, I promise." He grinned. I let him go and shook my head as he ran away and disappeared into the crowd. I knew he was lying; I saw him crossing fingers behind his back.

I returned with the purse in my hands, looking for its rightful owner that by this time should be distressed and sad for its loss. I was looking for a small brunette figure and if I was not mistaken, wearing a white dress with patterned green marbles. I found her a short time later in the middle of a small wheel of people who wanted to know what was going on there.

As soon as she saw me holding the purse she ran to meet me.

"Oh my God, thank you! Thank you very much." She stood on her tiptoes and wrapped her arms around my neck. "I don't know how to thank you enough, you have no idea of what you just did. Thank you. God! All my documents and all my money is here, I don't know what would I do if that little thief disappeared with my purse, I got distracted for one moment, only one second and the kid appeared from nowhere and snatched my purse. I confess that I thought about running after him, but by the time my brain realized that I should do that he already was so far away that..."

"Hey, calm down. Take a breath." I said, fearing she would have a breakdown in front of me. She then stopped and breathed so deeply that I feared she would end all the air from the train station.

She looked at me embarrassed and I smiled gently.

"My apologies. When I get nervous sometimes I speak without stopping and cannot control myself."

"No problem."

"Okay. But thank you again for having recovered my purse. "

"It was nothing. I only hope all your things are in there."

She looked at me worried and rolled her purse for a few minutes before looking back at me smiling.

"It is all here, thank you."

I noticed she was embarrassed and wasn't looking directly at me.

"Well... then it's all right, right?"

"Uh... I mean, yes, it's all right. Thank you again."

I shook my head and gave her my back.

"I am Rachel."

"I'm sorry?" I turned to her again. I think I was all disheveled and with my face and clothes wrinkled by the mocking smile she gave me.

"I said my name is Rachel."

"Uhm, ok."

"Hmm ... I think now is the part that you say it is a pleasure to meet me and tell me what's your name too, don't you think?"

I blushed at her remark. "Okay, so... I'm Quinn."

"It is a pleasure to meet you Quinn, although the circumstances are not very good and favorable for our presentation." She held out her hand which I shook briefly and then let go.

She was tiny, very soft and warm, like a cup of hot chocolate on a cold and gray day.

Ok, brain. From where I had taken off that?

"Well then... I guess I should go. Thank you again Quinn." She blinked at me before going and gave a popped little kiss in my pale cheek.

I watched her disappear and sat on the concrete step, leaned against a pillar straightening my blond hair down to my shoulders behind the ears. I touched by impulse with my fingertips where she had kissed me and I felt the place getting warm. I stood up and breathed deeply, decided to go to Breadstix take breakfast with the few coins that had remained in my pockets.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Sorry for taking too long to post chapter two, but here it is and I hope you enjoy it. Also wanna say thanks to my new beta _ohnanagleek_. Chapter three goes out next wednesday, promise! And tell me what are you guys thinking about the fanfic so far.**  
**Enjoy! :)**

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**Chapter two**

The days were going by and I hadn't yet made a final decision about what to do with my life. Didn't know if I would continue in Lima or if I would actually go to New York, I was hesitant and in the middle of this indecision I was feeling very lost. If only Santana were by my side to go through this whole phase with me... But she wasn't and I had to deal with that by myself. Maybe I should just stay in Lima, get a job, anything that could sustain me for a little while. I could learn anything fast and easy and maybe I could arrange a small room in some pension. At least until I could gather more money to keep me in New York.

I wasn't stupid, I knew that life had never been cheap in New York and although I knew that four years had passed, I believed that life there would be more expensive and... Well, with many people being called to fight in the World War II in Germany and leaving their homes and their jobs, it wouldn't be so hard to find something that I could do to support myself.

On a Friday night, likely in July, wasn't sure, I snuggled myself better on the wall that has been my bed for the last few days and closed my eyes slowly. I felt the discomfort because of the position and a groan of pain escaped my lips when I tried to get comfortable. The weather was a little cold and now and then made my skin crawl. Falling asleep seemed to be a struggle, so I opened my eyes and looked at the sky. The sky was beautiful and starry in Lima. Even though the moon wasn't full tonight, the sky was more beautiful than ever; it's been a long time since I've stopped and admired the stars. I instantly remembered my necklace with the butterfly pendant. I took it off my neck and started playing with it, passing it between my fingers.

I was playing with my new doll named Stacey when I saw Frannie entering our room. Her smile was wide and radiant as ever and her eyes seemed to have acquired a new luster.

**"Hey, why are you like that?" I asked clearly curious.**

**"I met a boy." She told me whispering like it was a precious secret.**

**"What? Who? "**

**"His name is Noah. He's so cute, Quinnie. "**

**"What?" I asked again still confused.**

**"I met him a few days ago when I went shopping with Mom at Mr. Hummel's grocery store. We met again today and he gave me this necklace, you know. And he told me a very sweet thing. I think I'm in love! "**

**"What?" I dropped my doll and climbed into bed sitting beside her.**

**"Look." She reached for the item hanging off her neck took it off. It was a little necklace with a butterfly pendant, studded with tiny blue stones and took my hands putting him there. "Isn't it beautiful?"**

**"Uhum." I confirmed shaking my blonde hair. I passed the small pendant between my little hands. It was very intriguing. The small stones reflected the bright light like diamonds.**

**"He said I was beautiful." She said with her eyes shining.**

**"But we know you're beautiful Frannie." I said confused, I didn't understand how she could be in love with a boy who stated the obvious.**

**"I know Quinnie." She laughed. "But it's more ... I dunno ... I think I feel more beautiful when he says that to me."**

**"Okay. And what else did he say? "**

**"Well, when mom got distracted he pulled me to the tool section, mom never goes there anyway, so it was safe. We talked a little and then he suddenly kissed me." She gushed.**

**"He kissed you? How? Like mom and dad kiss?" I asked curiously. She chuckled.**

**"Uhum." She sighed. "And it was so good, Quinnie. I felt butterflies in my stomach. "**

**"Like this one?"**

**"Yes, like that one. So, when we move away from each other he took the necklace from his pocket and gave it to me. It made me wonder why he was giving it to me, because he only knew me for a week; he told me that when you love someone, the time you know this person doesn't really matter. Then he said he was giving me a butterfly because one day he was walking through the park and remembered me when he saw one on a tree... that I was like a butterfly."**

**"Like a butterfly?"**

**"Uhum. He said that a butterfly goes through several stages before true transformation. He said that it teaches us that everything in life is important and its necessary to achieve freedom and inner transformation. I didn't quite understand what he meant by that, but it must mean something, right?"**

**IIIIIIII**

When I woke up, it was already morning. It had yet to reach dawn, so I had the opportunity to once again see the sun rise. My back was killing me and the muscles felt like it would rip at any time because of the pain.

Only God knew how much I needed a hot bath right now. I washed myself and as soon as the sun rose completely, then I headed to Breadstix. My clothes were rumpled and my hair a little dirty of dust, my shoes weren't in their best state either. But even then the waitress whose name was Sugar let me stay to take my usual coffee with the toasts barred with butter. She was the waitress who pulled more subject with me although I didn't tell her much about my life, much less that I was fighting in a war that was slowly but surely sinking Western and Eastern Europe. The war was ruthless, it was really kill or be killed. The fools were the ones who dared to interfere in the plans of the great leaders who commanded everything and hardly gave effort in time to fight for what they believed. The others were the ones who did that for them and they didn't know the time to stop and acknowledge that they were wrong. Every day new people were called to fight, inexperienced people who barely knew how to explain the properties of a gun, but it wasn't for me to judge whoever it was.

I turned my attention to the small TV hanging from the ceiling. President Franklin Roosevelt was talking, he stated that the death of American troops in Japan were increasing at an alarming amount. I could no longer swallow what was left of my coffee and much less could I help feeling my stomach turn. I got up and left without saying goodbye to Sugar. Minutes later I sat against the wall where I was sleeping.

I liked to observe people but today wasn't really a good day. I was distracted when I felt a small figure stop in front of me, blocking the sun that was shining in my face.

"Hey Quinn, what are you still doing here?" I looked up and I came across the tiny brunette who I had met few weeks ago, smiling this time in a green dress with white polka dots and with a green ribbon holding her hair. "Quinn?"

"What?" I asked wondering why she was calling me and now she was looking worried at me.

"Are you okay? Are you feeling something? "

"I ... n-no, I ..." I stuttered not knowing what to do. Why was she talking to me?

Then the tiny brunette crouched beside me, careful of her dress so that it wouldn't fly with the wind, tightly clutching her purse to her stomach.

"Why are you still here? Why are you wearing the same clothes that I saw you on that day? What's the matter Quinn?" She put a hand on my forehead. And like the last time, I could feel how soft and warm she was, even with the wind that blew. I didn't notice I was wearing the same clothes I had worn on that day. Actually, I think I was a little stunned by the questions, hindering my chances to answer them.

"I ... I'm fine ... um ..."

"Rachel."

"Rachel... yes. I'm fine, don't worry about me."

"You look pale, of course I'm going to worry. Have you been eating, you look a little too skinny?" I tried to smile. How could she have noticed? "Come with me." She said, trying to pull me to my feet.

"What?"

"I said come with me. I think you're lying to me when you say that everything is okay and it's not like I really believed you, so... I think you should come with me. I'll take care of you."

"But ... but ... but ..." I kept repeating as she lifted me by my arm. I saw her grimace and then look sideways at me.

"What's that smell? Quinn, is it you?" She asked pulling a funny face.

I felt my cheeks going warm and looked around to see if anyone had heard her. Thankfully, I saw no one had; everyone were too preoccupied with their things to pay attention to a beggar being helped by a petite brunette.

"Wow! Ok, no offense, but you definitely need a bath. Those are your things?" She pointed to my bag covered by the jacket. I shook my head yes. "Ok, let's get your stuff too."

"But you don't know me!"

"Of course I know you! You are Quinn, the girl who risked herself chasing a little thief only to recover my purse and if I remember correctly, you didn't know me well too."

She was right, but still... "It's different, he was just a kid and anyone could have gone after him."

"True, but what matters is that you went after him and no one else did, so I feel like I owe you this. Plus I want to, in some way, help you. Just accept my offer, ok?" Rachel looked at me and I could see how brown her eyes were. I shuddered, seeing the intensity in her eyes.

"You don't know me." I repeated. While a part of me wanted to go with her, the other was suspicious, because no single person I knew was so naïve to want to take home a strange person. Even if this unknown person looked like a beggar who wore the same clothes and smelled badly. "I may be a thug, a thief, or... or... or, I don't know, someone who wants to hurt you."

"We both know you're not like that, so stop trying to trick me. Pick up your things, you're coming with me to my house, period." Rachel looked at me seriously and I arched an eyebrow surprised with the authoritative tone of her. With that gesture I remembered Colonel Sylvester and a shiver ran down my spine.

"All right."

She smiled with satisfaction of my answer.

**IIIIIIIIIII**

I followed her through the sunny streets of Lima until I saw a white and baby blue wooden house with a huge garden and a short wooden fence very similar to my old house. The house was very beautiful and seemed to have two levels. Rachel opened the little door and pushed me inside. I stepped onto fresh green grass and instantly wished to be barefoot to better feel the touch of the grass with my feet. Before I could work up more wishes, Rachel appeared beside me and placed one of her hands on my waist, exactly on my injury and squeezed a bit making me let out a groan of pain. I stopped in the way to support myself on the railing of the wooden staircase that led to a small porch.

"What? What happened? Are you okay?" Rachel looked at me worried. "I'm sorry, I... I didn't mean to hurt you, did I hurt? Quinn, say something! You're making me nervous."

"It's okay, I just felt dizzy. Don't worry, it's nothing." She still was looking at me and I could clearly see in her eyes that she didn't believe a word I said. "Trust me, I'm not lying." I lied trying to give her a smile. "I'm okay now, we can continue or you've already given up on taking me inside?" I joked trying to assure her that everything was fine.

"Of course not."

She opened the door and I followed her into the house. I stood at the doorstep as she closed the door and headed for the kitchen. Then she noticed that I wasn't following her and that I was still standing near the doorway. I felt intimidated by the look she was giving me. Something inside of me said that I shouldn't follow her into the kitchen, but it wasn't a bad thing at all. I think she noticed my hesitation in following her as she returned by my side, taking me by the hand.

"You don't need to be afraid Quinn, I'm just trying to help." She said with her soft voice. Her brown eyes now looked at me with pity. I bet I really looked like a wet dog shrunk from fear. She pulled me by the hand and I saw myself being dragged to a small but cozy kitchen. I wouldn't know why, but deep down I kind of thought that the house matched perfectly with her. Small, beautiful and delicate as its owner...

"Can you wait here for a moment?" Rachel asked, pushing me gently into a chair. I nodded and she was gone for a few minutes. I was analyzing the kitchen wondering why a woman like her would help someone who she barely knew, inviting me inside her home without so much of a second thought.

When Rachel returned she was carrying in her arms what I could recognize as some towels, a toothbrush, a pair of men's pants and a white shirt. The shirt was of an immaculate white, a white that I had never seen of, so clean.

I stood up and picked the things from her arms.

"I think that you should take a bath first, you know... So you can feel better and to get that smell out of... not that you're not smelling good... um... I mean... you're not... I mean..." She was blushing hard and I couldn't help thinking about how beautiful she was at the moment.

"It's alright, I get it, don't worry."

"Okay then." She wrung her hands shyly. "I thought of lend you my clothes, but you are a bit bigger than me and I thought that maybe they weren't going to fit you, so I took the clothes from Jesse, my brother. Actually, my dead brother... if you don't mind. I don't know if they'll fit you... but at least they are clean."

"There is no problem, I'll use them. Thank you, Rachel."

There was an uncomfortable silent and I didn't know what else to say. I was still standing holding towels and now she was messing her hands nervously.

"Well, umm... the bathroom is upstairs and I already placed your hot water, so... I think you'd better go or it'll grow cold." She finally said. My lost eyes denounced me. "Just take the stairs near the doorway; once you get there you'll see three doors, two on your left and one on the right. It's the first door on the left. Everything you may need is in there, if you need something else don't be afraid, just shout it. I'll be here preparing something for us to eat."

"Rachel?" I called when she turned away from me and had already opened a closet full of pots.

"Huh?" She turned and looked me straight in the eye.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Why am I doing what?"

"This... Helping me."

She seemed to think a bit before giving a small smile. "Because you're a good person and I really liked you. As I said before, I'm just trying to help you like you helped me."

I really felt bad when she said I was a good person, but I didn't let her know that and just muttered an "ok, thank you" leaving the kitchen and following her instructions. If she really knew who I was and how many lives I had taken away...

When I got upstairs I actually saw three doors and walked in on the one she told me. The bathroom was relatively large and I thanked the heavens for finally being able to take a real bath with really hot water. I didn't know if Rachel was really speaking the truth when she said that she wanted to return the favor, but I wouldn't be stupid enough to not accept what she was giving me. Maybe it was God or something like that giving me perhaps a second chance to start again? But I knew it was temporary and that it wouldn't last long. She will probably want me out of her house at the end of the day and I would come back to the lonely train station, sleeping on the cold floor leaning against a hard, cold wall.

I left the things I was carrying in a white bench beside the tub and carefully pulled off my shirt. I entered the bath being careful not to touch my back on the edges and sat in the hot water, first washing my face with clean, warm water. My wound was burning in contact with the warm water and soap, but I really wasn't caring much about the burning as I struggled to make my body as clean as possible. I don't know if I will have another chance of taking a hot bath, so it was better to take advantage of this moment before it all ended. It was some time until I saw the skin on my fingers wrinkling and decided to get out.

I went downstairs already dressed in the set that Rachel had given me and with my dirty clothes in hands. A good smell invaded my nose, and I followed it to the kitchen where the smell was coming from. I approached the door and saw Rachel stuck in a red apron with some yellow and orange flowers, her hair tied in an impromptu ponytail and singing softly some music near the stove. Her image was simply lovely and spread a sense of warmth and comfort, things that I haven't felt in a long time. Like for example someone cooking for me...

I couldn't really figure out her reason for helping me... Maybe she is just really thoughtful like that. After standing there for a moment I cleared my throat, catching her attention. She immediately turned to me, her face on a frightened look and holding her chest with her hands. I just murmured a "sorry, didn't mean to scare you" and waited for her to tell me what to do.

"Here, give them to me." She took the clothes from my arms. I quickly stopped her when I saw her walking out of the kitchen.

"Wait! You can't throw them out, they're all I have! "

"Don't worry, Quinn. I was just putting them to wash later; I would wash now but I don't want to leave my wonderful stew to burn. "

"Oh. Ok. "

"Why don't you sit here while I finish? The stew will be ready in a minute, okay?" She smiled. "But I must warn you not to get too carried away. The stew is simple and it was the only thing I could think of that was fast to make; I thought that you must be hungry and it would be very inelegant leave a hungry person waiting."

"Well... I am pretty hungry." I sat at the table laid for two people and watched Rachel. Watched how smooth and precise her movements were, her steps were light and at the same time hypnotizing as she moved throughout the kitchen. Only after a long time did I notice this graceful woman already sitting in front of me and serving me.

"The sun sets in a bit." Rachel said looking at me. "Where are you from Quinn?"

"I was born here in Lima, but some issues had me elsewhere. I just got back not more than a month ago. "

"Can I ask you why you were sleeping on the train station?"

"How do you know I was sleeping in the train station?" I asked surprised, feeling my face begin to heat up.

"I saw you there." She answered and I noticed she was a little embarrassed. Neither of us said anything for a few seconds while I played with the rest of the stew of potatoes on my plate. "That was the day you recovered my bag, when I arrived home that day I noticed that my agenda wasn't in the bag and with the rush it should have fallen on the train station, so I went back there because she is very important to me. I know Mr. Figgins, the watchman; he let me in and then I saw you. You were in the dark part on the other side of the tracks and was laying on the floor covered with something. I recognized your blond hair." Rachel smiled shyly. "Guess he didn't see you because he can not reach the other side, you know, because of his leg."

"Yeah, I know." I assumed embarrassed for taking advantage of Mr. Figgins and his condition.

"So? You're not going to tell me? "

"I had... some problems." I answered as vaguely as possible averting my eyes from her curious eyes. I felt that Rachel wasn't satisfied with my answer by the disappointment on her face.

**IIIIIIIIIII**

I felt I could trust Rachel, she gave me this feeling of confidence. There was this calm sense about her that made me feel good. I couldn't explain how she was doing it, but at the same time I kept thinking about what she would do or say if I told her the truth. If I told her that I had killed hundreds of people in an empty war, that I was on leave from the army and had nowhere to drop dead and was living at the train station because a cheater woman had sold my mother's house which was mine by right for an unknown married couple; that I didn't even have a penny in my pocket and had to receive a few bucks from people who thought I was begging money not to die of hunger. That one of the things I asked the most when I layed down on the cold floor of the train station was to be able to take a hot bath again and sleep in a warm bed exactly equal to that sometimes Frannie and I used to share.

No.

I intended not to tell her anything about my miserable life.

"I know I shouldn't be insisting, but what kind of problems?" Rachel crossed her cutlery and then crossed her fingers expectantly.

"Family problems."

"I see that you are not of many words, Quinn. But... well, if you don't want to tell me, all right, I will respect it...but if you ever decide to tell me just know I'll be here to listen you, ok? I will not insist further on the subject." She stood up, taking her dish to her sink. "How about you help me with the dishes now?" Rachel cracked a smile that I just thought was lovely. I then stood and took my dish too.

When delivering her the dish our hands brushed and I could feel again the warmth emanating from Rachel's soft skin as an immediate chill went down my spine. She looked at me smiling sideways and broke our contact. I smiled as she turned away from me and continued washing the dishes. Her skin could be hotter than the summer and softer than silk sheets.

And for the second time since I met Rachel Berry, I asked my stupid brain where I had taken those stupid thoughts about Rachel's skin?!

Well, the answer doesn't really matter to me.

Rachel kept me in her house until the sunset, I was alert because I knew that anytime she would send me away from her house... but she wasn't doing it. The hours passed and she didn't send me away like I thought she would.

One of the things that I caught about Rachel Berry, was that she wouldn't stop talking. Rachel would shoot dozens of words per minute and I would usually find myself distracted when she began to ramble. I watched the movement of her mouth opening and closing, the smile that sometimes framed her slightly pouty lips painted of a pale pink and of the lovely smell of fresh grass she gave off.

I got scared as soon as I realized the hour on the small clock on top of her kitchen door and then I stood up in a hurry, scaring Rachel who was speaking to me about something related to the mayor of Lima.

"Rachel... I need to go." I said afflicted, praying that Mr. Figgins wouldn't close the doors tonight. "I think it's my time to go, you should be wanting to rest and here I am bothering you and not letting you sleep."

"What? No. No, Quinn. I think you misunderstood me." Rachel stood up and stopped in front of me. "When I said I wanted to help you I was serious. And that included not leaving you go back alone in that cold and dark train station. You will sleep here with me today."

I felt my heart speed up a little when I heard her say that I would sleep with her tonight. My incredibly perverted mind didn't miss the double meaning in Rachel's last sentence and felt my cheeks grow warm. Why was I thinking about those things?

"I ... I can't accept, Rachel. You've done so much for me, I can't ask you that anymore."

"Of course you can accept!"

"No, I can't."

"Quinn..." I realized that she was getting a little irritated and her cheeks were flushed. "I want you to stay and I will not take a no for an answer." Rachel said in a tone that clearly meant that the subject was closed.

I snorted a little annoyed for Rachel being so persistent. Why couldn't she just let me go? Why delay the time to say goodbye? Ok, maybe I was being a little dramatic. After a moment of pondering I came to a conclusion; if she wanted myself there, why not stay?

"Okay, but just for tonight." I said defeated and Rachel opened a huge smile.

So stayed in her house. Time passed while Rachel and I talked. In fact, I think she was trying to subtly pull something from me, after all, we were two strangers towards each other. At bedtime Rachel insisted for me to sleep with her since she didn't have another room in the house. I almost rolled my eyes at the thought of what kind of sane person would take a stranger to stay in your house and nonetheless, to sleep in your bed. At the end of the little discussion we had about it Rachel gave in and went to get me some bed sheets, then packed the small living room couch for me although I protested saying that I could do that by myself.

"If you need anything, and I mean anything at all Quinn, don't hesitate to knock the door of my room, ok? So, you already know that the kitchen is over there and the bathroom is upstairs if you need to drink water or feel like using the bathroom in the middle of the night because I usually tend to get anxious when I drink lots of water..."

"Rachel, breathe, okay?" I said with a small smile. "Don't worry about me, I don't want to disturb you."

"No, you will not disturb me! I'm serious Quinn..."

"Ok, I get it. If I need something just ask."

"Ok, Quinn. So... Goodnight."

"Goodnight Rachel."

She still gave me one last worried look before climbing the stairs with hesitant steps. I heard her door close and sat myself on the small couch. I curled up on it, could feel my back throb because of the injury and even though the couch was small I felt comfortable and warm; it was much better than sleeping on a cold floor.

For a moment, I admired Rachel's fireplace that was decorated with some younger pictures of her. Then I covered myself with the blanket Rachel gave me and when the smell of the soft tissue hit me I could smell Rachel Berry's scent all over me. Her perfume made me slightly dizzy. I said prayer before closing my eyes, the smell of Rachel Berry helping me to fall asleep happily.

**IIIIIIIII**

The next day I woke up sweating and scared after another tormenting nightmare; unpleasant mix between deaths, screams and blood. I was slowly catching my breath tying to call myself down. So much for falling asleep peacefully...

Not long after, Rachel greeted me with a warm good morning smile as she headed to the kitchen.

That day Rachel made me agree to stay for some time in her house; it wasn't like I was very willing to refuse anyways. I just didn't want to bring trouble to her, because I knew that they would happen eventually. Sometimes, I took the moments when she was distracted and studied her.

I noticed the small details in her which were absolutely adorable and sometimes annoying. Like for example the ability she had to insist so much on something that sometimes made me irritated, or even her bossy personality. I knew she was just trying to please me, but I couldn't understand why.

I got lost at nights, lying on the small couch in the living room, wondering how my life had come to this point.

You know what, I take that back... That was a lie.

I lost most of the time thinking about Rachel and remembering our conversations, replaying scenes of our conversations in my head. Sometimes I lose myself, remembering silly things she'd do and smile like a complete idiot.

I helped Rachel with some of the house work, like washing the dishes or watering the plants in the small garden she kept behind the house; I also helped cutting some firewood in the back of the house since it was a rather heavy duty, and Rachel couldn't exactly do it. When I asked what she did to have some firewood she told me she paid a boy named Artie who did that kind of work in the neighborhood. It wasn't a difficult tasks for someone who could carry a heavy backpack with almost twice their weight and still ran with it dodging gunfire, grenades, and other things that I would rather not recall at the moment. I always tried to do everything right to please Rachel, despite the pain because my back injury didn't healed properly and it insisted on giving me some dizziness (I tried to disguise them so that Rachel wouldn't notice).

A week passed, and I was still in the home of Rachel. The nights were getting colder in Lima and Rachel liked it when I lit the fireplace. I was cutting wood with an ax in the backyard, piling the mounds on the floor; grimacing because of the pain lifting the ax caused me. I would smile, imagining the smile that Rachel would give me when she got home and saw that everything was done the way she asked. When I felt the kitchen door slam, I turned, expecting to see Rachel smiling and wearing one of her wonderful dresses. But Rachel wasn't who I saw when I turned around. I freaked out when I saw a tall man wearing a suit and a fine hat on his head approaching me. He took the hat from his head and stared at me annoyed.

"Who are you?" He asked dryly, looking at me from my head to toes. I didn't like his gaze.

"Good morning." I said annoyed, trying to keep my good education. He didn't answer me. "My name is Quinn."

"I didn't ask your name, I asked who you were! What are you doing here in Rachel's house? By the way, where's Rachel? "

I put the ax on the ground and stared at him angrily. I really wanted to punch him right in the middle of his face.

"Why should I answer you? I don't know you, much less know how you got here and what you want with Rachel." I replied defensively.

"Look, girl..."

"Quinn." I growled through clenched teeth. I wasn't liking the way he was treating me, much less the annoyed look he threw me. I nervously played with my shirt. "I said my name is Quinn."

"Look, girl," He said on purpose just to annoy me. "Just tell Rachel that Finn Hudson was here, she'll understand when she get the message." He finished with a smile on his lips and turned away from me without waiting for my response, walking out the kitchen door.

I continued what I was doing, using a little more force than necessary to cut the wood, the pain I felt no longer bothering me. It was when I heard the kitchen door open again I turned around ready to send that Finn Hudson to hell, but then I saw Rachel running in my direction all beautiful and smiling. I was static as she hugged me.

"Quinn! I made it! I made it!" She repeated, throwing her arms around my neck. She released me soon after, straightened her red polka dot ribbon that held her hair back and it also matched the red polka dot dress that hit just below her knees.

"What did you accomplish Rachel?" I asked her smiling and leaning the ax again on the floor.

"A job for you. You were complaining that you didn't want to stay doing nothing while you were here, so today I took the opportunity and went to talk to Burt Hummel, an old friend of my father." Rachel said smiling. I vaguely remember that name. "He owns the Hummel grocery and he's an old man, he needed some help there in the grocery store and I suggested you. If you accept, of course."

"It's ok, Rachel." I smiled without much enthusiasm.

"What? You don't like it? If you don't like I can, maybe..."

"No Rachel, I'll accept it. It's just..." I sighed in defeat.

"Just..."

"It's not that I'm not happy about it, but... you know, I wish I had gotten that job on my own and not because you asked for it."

"Stop being stubborn Quinn, you know that I was only trying to help. And there's nothing wrong with accepting help when it's needed."

"I know, Rachel... but you've already helped me a lot and I don't know how to pay you, I have no way to repay and I really can't understand why you're doing this though you have already said that you just want to help me and return the favor for what I did helping you with your bag. But you're doing much more than that. "

I saw Rachel take a deep breath before looking at me with this serious look.

"Quinn, you know I don't want you to pay me anything. I'm doing this because I want to and I don't expect anything in return, believe me. I know you're confused and I am too. But I want to help you, I feel I must help you. So you will go to the grocery store tomorrow to speak with Mr. Hummel and you will get the job. Period."

"Look, Rachel..." I spent a hand through my hair a little annoyed.

"I'll make lunch in an instant and you can go up and take a shower to get all that sweat off of you." She ignored me and continued talking as she walked back to the kitchen. I realized that Rachel wasn't going to make this easier for me. "I'll make a fast and practical lunch that I know you'll like it."

I let my arms fall around my defeated body. Rachel always got what she wanted from me. I just didn't know if I could resist much more of her persistence with those brown eyes looking at me the way they do when she wanted something from me. I didn't know what was happening to me and didn't even know if I really wanted to find out. Rachel left me intrigued. And I don't know if that was good or bad.

We had lunch almost without exchanging more than ten words and I felt little uncomfortable every time she glanced at me. Then she went to work with the dresses that she'd to sew and sell to the young ladies from Lima to sustain herself. Dresses that seemed to me wonderful, even though she insisted that they were very much simple and were nothing compared to the big and famous designers from New York.

I sometimes found myself imagining Rachel in one of those dresses; twirling at the sound of romantic music with a smile framing her face and happiness in her bright eyes. But then I would quickly recompose myself and attempted to send this picture to the back of my mind and try to concentrate on other things.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter three**

Mr. Hummel received me very kindly and friendly and didn't fail to give Rachel a compliment for having indicated him such a beautiful girl like me. I didn't thought in the same way, but I only agreed with him and smiled whenever he touched the subject. His grocery store was very large and I realized that he was selling a bit of everything from food, household items, tools for cars and alcoholic beverages. He had two nice assistants and one of them was Kurt, who later I came to find out that he was his son; and Blaine, who was a very friendly and cheerful boy. In the early days that I started working they were very friendly and warm, they always helped me and tried to teach me things the best way possible and I also tried to learn everything properly to do nothing wrong and disappoint Rachel. I didn't wanted to leave her disappointed because of me and much less ruin her friendship with Mr. Hummel. I still remembered of Finn Hudson and sometimes the curiosity to know who he was talked louder and I sometimes asked myself whether or not to tell Rachel that he were looking for her the day she got the job for me at Mr. Hummel's grocery. But I also had a bad feeling whenever I thought of him being something more than just Rachel's acquaintance, this feeling was stronger than the curiosity and prevented me to say something to her even knowing that it was wrong to hide that from her.

"Hey." Rachel stopped in front of me with a glass full of milk in hands.

It was Tuesday night and it was a little cold that time of night.

"Hey." I answered back smiling and sitting on the couch, making room for her to sit beside me. And she did.

Rachel straightened her white silk robe before sitting down beside me.

"Can't sleep?" I shook my head no. "It's too cold." She complained shrinking on the couch. The living room was a bit dark and the only light came from the fireplace and the little wood that still burned. I looked sideways at Rachel and saw her sipping her milk. She radiated warmth and by just having her by my side I no longer felt very cold. Rachel warms me up. "Want some?"

"No, thank you. I'm fine."

"Why can't you sleep?" I felt curiosity in her voice.

"I don't know... the cold, I think." I lied. I couldn't sleep because I was afraid to wake up once again sweaty and scared, afraid to dream again with things I wanted to forget, but never could or would.

"Well you should. Tomorrow you wake up early and have to go to work, you'll feel tired for not sleeping right." I felt Rachel turn to me and pull the blanket that was covering me to her. "I have a theory. If you sleep eight hours per day you'll wake up happier and your day will be more productive, your skin will have a well-deserved rest and not to mention that it's healthy to sleep eight hours of sleep per day. Don't you agree?"

I let out a giggle. Had forgotten how lovely Rachel Berry was when she started talking in full one thirty in the morning.

"I guess so."

"So... are you enjoying working at Mr. Hummel's grocery store?" She asked after a few silent minutes.

"Yes... it's nice working there. He is nice and treats me well, Kurt and Blaine are nice to me too and always help me. I just organize things up on the shelves and carry some boxes."

"But why he makes you carry boxes? That must be why you always come home too tired! I'll talk to him tomorrow and..."

"Hey Rachel, calm down." I asked gently touching her arm. "That's not a problem, I like to carry boxes and it's not like they're too heavy for me, I have carried heavier things when I was in the arm-y... y... my house."

Rachel turned to me quickly. I cursed my giant mouth and her ability of being unable to remain shut for too long near Rachel.

"Wait, what? What did you say?"

"I... nothing." I tried to get up off the couch but she grabbed my wrist forcing me to continue sitting beside her.

"Quinn ..." The way she said my name sent a shiver down my spine and I couldn't tell if it was because of her slightly husky voice or because of the cold it was.

I turned to Rachel.

"Open up with me Quinn. It's good to once in a while, you know? To take these things off your chest. "

"I can't..."

"Yes, you can. You just have to want it." She insisted.

"I just can't..."

"Try."

"What?" I asked confused.

"Just try it... you'll never know if you can or not if you never try." I felt her warm hands wrapping my arm. "It may not be today... but I want you to try. Because I see a shadow in your eyes and I feel you want to let it go but you can't. I can help you."

I gasped feeling my eyes go wet. Why was she doing this to me? I didn't wanted to remember! Rachel would get away from me, I was certain.

"I don't know if I'm ready to tell. It's just... it hurts too much." Some tears escaped and I stifled a sob with my hand, feeling like an idiot for crying in front of Rachel.

Rachel left the glass on the floor and hugged me sideways, pulling my head into her lap and stroking my hair while murmuring comforting words in my ear. The position was very uncomfortable for me and when I felt a twinge of pain in my back other tears rolled down. Rachel held me stronger, I clung more to her and tried to concentrate on her scent and stop crying, but not even her scent made me stop crying. Instead, it only made me cry more and more and I no longer knew why I was crying. I couldn't tell in which part of the night I fell asleep in Rachel's arms, but when I woke up in the morning she was no longer with me on the couch and I just wished everything hadn't passed of a dream. But it wasn't a dream. The glass of milk that Rachel had left on the floor was still there in the morning and I was so worried about whether it was a dream or not that didn't realized something... _I had no nightmares that night._

On the days that have passed I tried to avoid Rachel and her questions, that's why I always changed the subject whenever she brought it up, I didn't wanted to admit it, but I was afraid of losing Rachel. I was afraid that when I told her the truth and said who I was she would kick me out of her house and would never look in my face again. I was holding on to her and I knew I shouldn't, but it was stronger than me. I felt wonderful when she was near me, I got happy when she smiled or when she straightened her hair behind her ears gently. And every look, every conversation, everything in Rachel fascinated me. And that was dangerous. Because I no longer wanted to go away from her house, I no longer wanted her to send me away and let me go. Rachel was making me feel things, she made me feel so good that I forgot my problems and my ghosts. But everything wasn't like I wish it was and when it seemed that everything was going fine something always happened and appeared to spoil everything.

It had been a month and a half that I was living with Rachel. I was returning from the grocery store at noon because Mr. Hummel had dismissed me since the movement of the grocery store wasn't very big and Kurt and Blaine could have handled it. I carried a package with some stuff I had bought to surprise Rachel when she arrived home, I knew that at this time she would be at some client's house taking measurements and I wanted to prepare a lunch for her, a simple thing, just a recipe my mother had taught me when I was fifteen. I passed the white door and as I approached the main door I saw that it was slightly open. Then I heard Rachel's altered voice.

"You had no right Finn!"

"Rachel, baby…" I got startled when I heard Finn calling her baby. "What did you want me to do? You know my father! He said he would leave me nothing if I didn't rushed things with you!"

"But you had to have talked to me before! Who do you think I am?"

"But I came here three weeks ago! I looked for you but you weren't here, so I went to the backyard and there was this girl cutting wood..."

"Quinn? Are you talking about Quinn? She was here when you arrived?"

"Yes, she were! And I ordered her to let you know I had been here. She didn't tell you?"

_Ordered? Ordered? Your idiot, son of a..._

"No... she didn't... she didn't said anything." I heard Rachel's disappointed voice say. "But, after that? Was it hard for you to come back again?"

"But I had to travel with my dad, sweetie... you know, the campaign can't wait and with this war you never know what might happen."

"Finn, nothing justifies that! How do you think I felt at being congratulated with one of my clients because she had seen in the newspaper today that I would get married in two months with the future Mayor of Lima, while nor did I knew that?"

My heart nearly stopped while listening to it. Did I heard her correctly? Rachel was engaged? She was going to marry? And on top of it with this arrogant and rude Finn Hudson?

"You had no right to mark the date without consulting me!"

"But I already explained it to you, Rachel. You have to understand that I had to do it, my dad was pressing me and you have to realize that if I am married before the elections I'll have more credibility among the people, they give more priority to family and I could win Karofsky easily."

"You even thought about me while did that decision? If you haven't noticed, a wedding doesn't happen on its own and we both had to have talked about this before!"

"What is it, huh, Rachel? I don't understand you! We are engaged for nearly two years, it isn't news to anyone that we would end up getting married and why not anticipate that, huh? I'm doing this for our own good, baby."

"For YOUR good, Finn! Your, not ours!"

"Look, I'm not going to discuss this with you right now, baby. I really have to go but that doesn't mean that the subject ends here. The preparations for our wedding have already started and I'm already making a list of guests, so don't worry too much about it. Just relax, okay?"

"I think it's better for you to go now Finn."

I jumped away from the door as fast as I could and hid myself. I still saw when he kissed her at the door and put the hat on his head, walked into a black car and left. Rachel closed the door and I sighed feeling my stomach turn. I felt something warm run down my cheeks. I ran my hands through my hair, they were instantly attracted to the butterfly pendant.

_What's happening with me, Frannie?_

I couldn't get in and face Rachel. Instead I chose to go for a walk to calm down and ended up in Breadstix. When I walked in Sugar soon came to me smiling and I couldn't return her smile, she seemed glad to see me again after some time without seeing each other. I let her talk about her life without even paying attention to what she was saying. My mind was in Rachel. I wondered myself why she never told me about her marriage.

_And why would she say anything to you, Fabray? My mind was attacking me. She's just doing you a favor letting you live with her!_

But then how would I explain the things I saw in Rachel's eyes every time she looked at me? Sometimes I saw pity in them, also saw compassion and another mix of things that I couldn't read. But then why was I feeling like this? Why I cared about the fact that Rachel would marry soon with Finn Hudson? Perhaps because I was afraid that he would make her suffer or would suffocate her with his arrogant manners and air of superiority that were his most unpleasant features. In the short time I lived with Rachel I saw that she was a free person and her brightness couldn't be overshadowed. Also, she was a person who wouldn't accept orders easily. She had a strong and determined personality; and delicate at the same time. I didn't know how in such a short time living together Rachel managed to become such an important part of me that even I was unaware. And I was just worried about her well-being, right?

I remained in Breadstix until sunset, only then I took the courage needed to go back to Rachel's house. My head ached as if my brain were to jump out at any moment and my eyes were swollen, I smiled remembering how Sugar almost panicked when noticed it. She was very overstated, but I liked her. Maybe if Rachel knew her she would also like her. And here again I was thinking of Rachel.

I opened the main door and slowly sneaked in, trying not to make any noise to denounce my presence to Rachel, I noticed all the lights were off and figured she should already be in her bed sleeping.

"Finally Quinn!" I heard Rachel's voice in the dark and choked out a scream when she turned on the living room light. I was scared and my heart should be pounding so hard that I contemplated the possibility of Rachel come to hear his crazed beats.

"Rachel! You scared me!" I exclaimed breathing heavily.

"What happened to you Quinn?" Rachel approached me with cautious steps and her voice remained worried when analyzing me. "Where have you been until now? I went to the grocery store and Kurt told me you had been released earlier."

"Yes, I... I was, but... I decided to take a walk afterwards." I replied sitting on the couch who served as my bed in the last few days.

"And why didn't you warn me up before? I was worried."

"My apologies, I forgot." I shrugged.

Rachel approached me and started looking me up and down sizing me up, then she put her hand over my forehead.

"Quinn, you are so pale!" She observed scared. "And you're burning with fever!"

"It's nothing Rachel, I'm fine."

"Of course you're not well! You need a cold bath and warm clothes. Come on, I'll help you take a bath."

"No!" I screamed scared and Rachel looked at me confused when I pulled my arm. So I tried to justify myself. "No, what I meant... I didn't mean to sound like... that is... don't need to, I can do that myself... and..."

"You are so stubborn, Quinn! How many times have I told you to stop being proud and let me help!? I can drop you there and you can fall in the bathtub or something, don't even want to think about it."

"But Rachel..." I tried to protest as she opened the bathroom door. I didn't wanted her to see me naked! Much less wanted her to see my wound, Rachel would give me a long lecture about my irresponsibility like if she were my mother and I would eventually end up feeling bad about it. But what was the point of arguing with Rachel Berry? She wouldn't shut up and didn't give me any chance to speak, which was something that annoyed me sometimes.

"If you don't stand still and let me take off those clothes I..."

"Rachel, I'm fine! I'm serious. I can take a bath alone, you can leave me and go to sleep, it's already too late and... and your eight hours of sleep..."

"You're ashamed of me Quinn?" She asked trying to look me in the eyes but I swerved contact, blushing and finding Rachel's carpet the most interesting thing in the world to look at the moment. "You're ashamed of me!"

"Rachel..."

"You look pretty blushing like this..." I felt her slowly unbutton my shirt. "But you know there is no need to act like this, we are two women and I also have what you have, and it's not as if I had never seen a pair of, you know, so..." she finished rolling her eyes.

Rachel took off my shirt and pushed me to sit on the toilet, with the sudden movement I ended up hitting my back and let out a moan of pain when I felt the wound burning. Rachel, who was already opening the tap turned to me frightened.

"What is it Quinn? Are you okay? Did I hurt you?" She asked worried, until her gaze stopped on my shirt and her face changed from worried to frighten. I followed her gaze and looked at my shirt that was on the white stool beside the bathtub and saw a blood stain on his back. "My goodness, Quinn!"

She turned me around and I could see from the mirror the unpleasant grimace she made while she observed my injury. I tried to turn to look at it too, but she held me in place and wouldn't let me turn to see.

"Where did you get this wound?" I didn't answer. "It's a little purple and I think it is infected!" She said sighing. I felt her touch near the area and unintentionally shivered. "Are you feeling cold?" I nodded. She then turned off the tap and made me sit on the toilet again, covered me with a towel, walked through the door and disappeared for a few minutes. When she returned carrying a water bucket I was seated in the same position. I felt my head exploding and when I got up to help her she raised up a hand stopping me.

Rachel turned the bucket - that I supposed to be hot water - in the bathtub and opened the cold water mixing the two of them.

"Come on, get in the bathtub before you catch a flu too. We need to wash the wound to disinfect then I'll have to drain it." Rachel said serious.

I obeyed Rachel and quietly removed my pants and got in the bathtub with hot water. I cringed when I felt the wound get in contact with the water. When I thought Rachel would leave me alone she pulled the white stool and sat down next to me, grabbed the soap and rubbed her hands with it, washing my blonde hair.

I was feeling like a child who had just done something bad and was caught by his mother. I could tell by Rachel's silence that she was very angry and that if I tried to justify myself now she would explode, so I kept waiting for her to say something.

"How did you get it? By the state of it I guess that it wasn't today you got hurt."

"I was stabbed. I think it's been two months." I replied shrugging. I heard Rachel release an indignantly sigh.

"Two months? You're like this since two months ago and hasn't bothered to treat it? Quinn!" She was rinsing my hair and I felt the soap get into my eyes but stayed quiet as she rubbed it off. "Tell me how you got stabbed."

"It was on battle, I was unprotected when a Nazi soldier got through the barriers of sand and stabbed me." I answered to her authoritative tone without even realizing what I had just said.

"You were in the army? Fighting in Germany?" Rachel said astonished and I was almost sure that she raised her voice a little more than necessary while stopping rinsing my hair.

"I... I..." You and your big mouth Quinn! I thought panicking. The first thing that occurred to me was to deny everything I said and lie to Rachel, but instead I chose to tell her the truth. As much as I was embarrassed with myself for what I had done and the lives I had taken, as much as I was afraid she would send me away from her house and her life it wasn't fair to lie to Rachel. It wasn't fair to her or to myself, so I followed the advice Rachel gave me that night and tried. "Yes. I was."

We stayed silent. Rachel was probably digesting the information. Realizing who was the person that was with her and probably was preparing herself to kick me out of her house. But then she surprised me when she touched me again and rubbed my back gently trying to avoid the wound.

"How long?"

"Hum?" I Murmured confused.

"For how long were you there?"

"Four years." I closed my eyes. This gesture brought me pleasant memories from the time when Santana Lopez was still alive and how we played and annoyed the other girls on the camp. Then the memory of her dying in my arms came to my mind and...

"Quinn?" Rachel called me, taking me from the painful memory of the death of Santana Lopez.

"Huh?"

"We're done."

Rachel wiped me with a towel and gave me other warm clothes. She didn't asked me anything more and it was making me nervous. She went down to pick me a pill and left me in her bedroom, sitting on her bed, admiring her bedroom. It was the first time Rachel let me enter her room. Although my head was killing me, I watched curiously every single detail of it, the good taste in Rachel's decoration was remarkable. She returned a few minutes later carrying a tray and a first aid box in her hands.

"I'll try to clean the wound, remove all the crap from inside and make a bandage, but if he continues swollen and purple like that until tomorrow, I'll have to call a doctor." She touched my forehead again. "You're still burning with fever!" She opened the first aid box. "Pull up your shirt first and lay on your stomach so that I can take care of this wound."

I did as she said and turned around, put my head into Rachel's pillow and soon felt the scent from her hair invading me.

"I'm just wondering why you didn't told me about this before, maybe if you had done so we wouldn't be here right now. I'm sure that the fever is because of the infection."

"I didn't want to bother you."

"I'll pretend I didn't hear what you just said." I felt her touching my shoulders and run her hands down my waist. "So... I guess now is a good time for you to start telling me who you are Quinn."

"What do you mean?"

"I respected you when you didn't wanted to open yourself or when you didn't wanted to answer my inquiries about what concerns your life, but you have to agree with me that we can no longer go on like this. I will not force you to do anything, but you don't think I should know who is living under my roof?"

"I know that Rachel, but I'm ashamed..."

"Ashamed of what Quinn? Of telling me who you are? Of opening up to me?"

"Ashamed of the failure that I am." I said a bit harshly pulling away from Rachel.

"Stay still. I guess I'll have to stitch a part of your wound." She said calmly. "And you are not a failure Quinn, as much as you think so, you're just not."

"Yes, well... if you have nowhere to drop dead and the fact of living of favor at your house and having to live with unpleasant nightmares every night is not a failure... try again."

"Well... if it's any consolation for you, I also think I'm a failure. I can't even make decisions on my own, other people do it for me and I do nothing to stop them. I'm too cowardly." Rachel said bitterly. She was opening up to me. Like that, so easily. And I couldn't do that with her. Why things had to be so complicated? "So no, I don't think you're a failure."

"Really?"

"Really."

I breathed deeply twice trying to gather some courage to tell her. I felt when Rachel spent a cloth around the section and I shuddered when I sensed it was warm.

"My name is Lucy Quinn Fabray, but I don't really like Lucy, I prefer Quinn or even Fabray. Don't ask me why, just don't like it very much."

"I think Lucy is a wonderful name. Like you." She said interrupting me.

"I lived here in Lima with my parents and my sister." I sighed closing my eyes. No longer felt the touch of Rachel on my back, but I knew she was there listening. "When the war started, they needed the support of American troops in Germany and I had to enlist, they practically forced me and threatened to take away our house, so I did and a few months later I was being called. My mother begged me not to go, but I didn't listened her." I sniffled, remembering the discussion I had with her before I left for the army. "First there was some training and there I met Santana. Then they needed reinforcements and we had to go to Belgium. Then to France and so it was from camp to camp until we got in Germany. We suffered an ambush in a village near Berlin and Santana ended up not resisting the injuries. I received two shots that, thank God, didn't caught any organ and some months later I was stabbed in the back. I was unconscious for three days until when I woke up Colonel Sylvester managed to get me a license to... ouch!" I groaned in pain as I felt her fingers pressing my wound.

"Sorry." She whispered and I felt her blowing my skin. "Sorry."

She repeated the process and I felt when she cleaned the wound with one of the warm cloths and placed a powder on top of it which burned a little. The pain was almost unbearable but I had already gone through worse, so I told myself I had to hold on and not scream like a scared little child. Seconds later I felt the needle going into my flesh and clung to Rachel's sheets.

"Ouch... Rachel... ouch... it hurts too much!" I whimpered biting my teeth hard. She was slowly sticking the needle in my skin. It was making me see stars.

"I know... I know, Quinn... bite something to soothe the pain."

I took her advice and bit her pillow tightly and squeezed my hands harder. My knuckles were white and I was beginning to feel tired, didn't know what was happening, my eyes were no longer holding on to stay open, I felt Rachel's room spinning in slow motion and for a moment my body got relaxed. Was too tired.

"Quinn? Quinn? QUINN!" I heard Rachel's voice increasingly distant.

"Answer me Quinn... Quinn?"

Then suddenly everything went black.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I'm so so so sorry guys! I'm ashamed of myself haha It's been almost a month without an update and I apology for that. Here is chapter four. Hope someone still read this even with no reviews :) and thanks to my beta ohnanagleek!  
Enjoy!**

* * *

**Chapter 4**

I opened my eyes frightened, feeling my body completely wet. I didn't recognize immediately where I was, looking around and blinking several times to gain focus; I found a figure curled up in a chair and covered with a pale blue blanket. Rachel slept curled up in her chair and her expression seemed agonized. Was she having a nightmare?

That's when I realized where I was. I was in Rachel Berry's bed. And no, it was not in the way I wanted unconsciously to be. That frustrated me a little. When trying to get up to go to the bathroom, I felt dizzy and sat back on the bed. I felt a tug of pain and placed a hand on my back and touched the bandage that Rachel must have done while I slept. I ran my eyes across the room and in the corner near Rachel I saw a bowl with several cloths inside, the little first aid box remained on Rachel's nightstand and then my eyes went straight to the pair of pants neatly folded across the bed. Those were my pants. Rachel had taken my pants. When trying to get them I made a miscalculated move and ended up dropping the first aid box, scaring Rachel and making her jump from the chair.

"Quinn! You're awake!" She exclaimed happily and stood up to hug me. "You scared me, Fabray!" Rachel whispered in my ear still hugging me. The little hairs in the back of my neck reacted immediately when I heard her speak in that husky and sensual tone, even though unintentionally. "I thought you would never wake up, you sleepyhead."

"How long have I been here?"

"Two days." She released me. "I begin to think that you're a fan of faintness." She teased smiling.

"Maybe ..."

"How do you feel? Do you still have fever?" She touched my forehead trying to feel if I was hot. "I think it lowered for a while. But you have to go take a bath. In the meantime, I'll prepare a delicious breakfast for you, how about that, hmm? You think you can bathe yourself?"

"I think so. But I don't want to give more work to you. I've already been occupying your bed and..."

"So... American pancakes or toast with honey?" Rachel ignored me and I rolled my eyes.

Should've expected her to do that.

"American Pancakes." I muttered as she leaves the room. I gave a tired sigh and rose from the bed, leaning against the wall to get to the bathroom. When I got there I saw a hot water bath already ready for me. Suddenly I wanted to cry, I don't even know quite why. Why was Rachel treating me like she was...? She took care of me and doesn't ask me anything in return for it. I've never met someone like her. Normally people always want something from you, regardless of what it is; but Rachel wasn't like that. Why wasn't she like that? Why was Rachel such a totally lovely person? And then I remembered Finn Hudson and their conversation and Rachel telling me how she was a coward. She didn't know that I was the real coward between the two of us. All because I was afraid to find out what I was feeling, an idiot fear of losing Rachel to Finn Hudson. It was the fear that she would leave me as soon as she married him; and from the little I knew about Finn Hudson's personality, he would demand Rachel to move in with him and to submit to his every whim. It was just this that was leaving me with emotions under my skin, right?

Wrong!

It was much more than that. I just needed to figure out what it was, I needed to want to find out what it was. Yes, because deep down...deep down I knew that this was the least of it.

"I need to see how your injury is, okay?" Rachel asked as she poured me two pancakes on the plate and then watered them with honey.

We were in the kitchen, I managed to convince her not to serve me breakfast in bed. She was a bit reluctant at first, but in the end I did my best face of a fragile patient and she didn't resist, and ended up letting me go down with her to the kitchen.

"All right."

"I also have to measure your fever, when I measured yesterday you were with 39° C and was sweating a lot."

"I feel a little better now. Thank you Rachel. "

"For what?"

"For taking care of me." I said sincerely.

"I'm sure you'd do the same for me." She smiled warmly. "Ah! I almost forgot! Kurt sent a note to find out how you were."

"And what did you tell him?" I asked worried. I swallowed the piece that was on the fork without even bothering to chew. I was wondering if he had sent the note to tell me how fired I was.

"I told him you were sick and that you wouldn't go to work for at least a week." Rachel said in her authoritative tone. My jaw dropped as I stared at her. "Don't give me that look! What did you wanted me to say? Besides, I wouldn't let you go to work that sick anyway, so it wasn't like you had a choice. I'm certain that Kurt understood and wished you to get better soon, he said he wouldn't tell his father so you could rest in peace. Also that you would have your job waiting for you when you recover. "

"But Rachel... what am I going to do with a week without doing nothing?"

"What about trying to recover?!" She retorted sarcastically. "Did you know you could have died if I hadn't discovered your injury in time and treated it?"

"Ok, I get it, you don't need to be so dramatic."

"Oh Lucy Quinn Fabray! I am outraged!" Rachel said faking indignation and grabbing her chest theatrically. "I'm not dramatic!" The sight of Rachel playing to cheer me up had an good effect on me and I gave her a small smile. Ok, I kind of laughed of the situation and the sight of Rachel pretending to be offended.

"Yes, you are." I managed to say between laughs. She also laughed and looked at me with affection.

"Yes, I am." Rachel admitted after a while, stopping laughing as she looked me in the eye. I also stopped laughing and stared at her, when I thought she couldn't get any more beautiful than she already was, there she was surprising me and showing me that yes, she could get even more beautiful than she already was.

We stared at each other in silence. Rachel suddenly became serious and broke our moment standing up and collecting away my plate along with hers. She turned away from me and was already starting to wash the dishes. I watched her in silence until she decided to break it.

"I know this is not the ideal moment for us to talk about it, but... I need to know." She said with her back to me. I was on alert with her tone. "Why didn't you tell me that Finn Hudson was here looking for me?"

Rachel took me by surprise and I stood motionless for a few seconds. And then I chose to take the easier path:

Lying.

"I don't ... I ... and-I forgot. I'm sorry."

"Oh." I heard her sigh of relief. "I thought... that you... never mind."

And then a sudden feeling hit me. I was angry and I think I passed it in my voice when I asked rudely:

"Why? He was someone important? "

"Well, yes... he's my fiancé."

I don't know why, but hearing her admit that he was her fiancé made me sad. Rachel must have noticed the sudden silence and turned, wiping her hands on a yellow washcloth.

"We're getting married in two months."

"Yeah... I know." I admitted with my head low.

"How do you know?"

"I mean... hmm... I read in the newspaper at Mr. Hummel's grocery store." I lied quickly, remembering her and Finn's conversation.

"Oh... you saw it."

"Yes." She looked away. "I think now I must congratulate you, right?"

"Right." I saw how Rachel was a little flushed and embarrassed. So I got up and carefully approached her, planting a long kiss on her left cheek as I hugged her.

"Congratulations, Rachel." My voice sounded melancholic in her ear.

"Thank you Quinn." She whispered. And then we split up.

"I will..." Rachel pointed out the door embarrassed. "I will... get the... the little box up there to change the bandage." She finished extremely flushed and disappeared through the door without waiting for my answer. I let myself down heavily on the chair and let my shoulders drop in defeat.

**IIIIIIIII**

The week went by too fast for me and I was watching Rachel's wedding getting closer every day. I saw when the two of us went out on the streets of Lima people stopping Rachel and congratulating her, wishing happiness and a lot of babies for her and Finn Hudson, the future mayor of Lima. No one spoke of anything else in the city, besides the war that had still not expected completion of course. Rachel saw how embarrassed I was and always tried to hurry people, but Rachel was never rude; on the contrary, she was the kindest person I knew, so she always smiled and thanked with a yellow smile.

Deep down I knew she wasn't happy with this marriage, but was sticking with it anyway and all I saw when everyone talked about that damn wedding, were Rachel's eyes shining. I had admitted to myself that I was jealous of Rachel and this only helped to make me even more confused. Why would I be jealous of Rachel? I saw no reason to be. Just my dislike of her boyfriend. I didn't hide it from the first time we met. I knew he wasn't the one for Rachel. But then who would be the one for her? At least I know that Finn Hudson was not that person. And days later his visit confirmed that.

It was Saturday, I was helping Rachel cooking lunch and we were having so much fun. She told me about one of her clients attack. The woman ordered a dress with Rachel and a month later when she came to try the dress it ripped because she got fat and ended up blaming Rachel, saying she had taken wrong measures. And the worst is that she would no longer have time to do any other dress, so Rachel had to mend the dress hurriedly with other fabrics, making the lady look like a walking scarecrow. We were laughing about the history when we heard the doorbell ring. Rachel went to open and I went after her.

"Hello sweetie." Finn said after stealing a kiss from her, leaving her startled. I snorted from where I was and rolled my eyes. "I missed you."

"F-Finn! You didn't tell me you would come for lunch, I... I..." Rachel stuttered looking at me sideways. Finn held her in his arms and was hugging her. But when he saw me he released her and looked at me annoyed. Rachel looked so small beside him...

"So is it true sweetie?" I grimaced while listening to the nickname. My stomach was turning with that scene. Rachel pulled away from him and closed the door.

"What is really true Finn?"

"I heard out there that you had put this... girl... inside your house. That she was living with you. But I didn't believe it when I heard. But I see that it's true. And you have not told me anything about it, Rachel." He said accusingly.

"I had nothing to say Finn. Quinn is just a friend that I'm helping."

She looked at me and that was the cue for me to go back to the kitchen and leave them alone. I mumbled a dry 'hello' to him and turned away. I was hurt by the words of Rachel.

_Just a friend? Just a friend? What did you expected Quinn? Of course you are just a friend!_

The minutes went by and my will was to hide and hear everything that was going on in the living room. I wanted to hear what Rachel would tell him about my presence in her house. I was dying to know what was happening there, something was eating away at my chest every time I remembered the overwhelming kiss he gave her when he arrived. What was killing me was the knowledge that Rachel returned the kiss; she also wanted him.

A few minutes later I heard a door slamming and saw Rachel walk into the kitchen with a heavy face. She wouldn't look me in the eye and went straight to the oven to take the food out. I watched her do it all in silence. For a moment I got distracted staring at Rachel's dress and how it did justice to her beauty. Rachel made her own dresses and I was amazed at how she could look so beautiful in a simple flowered sundress. She was so delicate! Her lightweight gestures enchanted and fascinated me, I could stare at Rachel my whole life if she allowed me. I would never get tired of watching her, she's the most beautiful piece of art I've ever seen and I was seriously starting to worry about the amount of nonsense that my brain could produce every time I was standing near her. I wondered sometimes if Finn Hudson was aware of the precious gift that was Rachel Berry.

I couldn't take it anymore the curiosity and broke the silence.

"Is he gone?"

"Yes. He said he would be quick, and that he had to go deal with some issues about the campaign."

"Ok... Just thought he would stay for lunch and if I was to put another plate on the table or not."

"No, no... Finn never stays for lunch." She replied distractedly. "Or dinner."

"Then why-..." are you still with him? That's what I wanted to ask her, but I controlled myself in time. "Why did he come?"

"I believe this is none of your business." Rachel said sharply, violently placing the basket of bread on the table.

I was startled by her sudden change of mood and lowered my gaze. She was right. She didn't owe me satisfaction. But even then, I felt my chest tighten and there I was wanting to cry once more. Rachel didn't need to use more than half a dozen words to hurt me, even though this wasn't her intention, but when it was about Rachel I felt very fragile. As if I was a crystal that could be broken. I let out a very small sigh. Then I remembered, I was Quinn Fabray, I always learned how to camouflage my emotions, whether they were good or bad.

Rachel seemed to notice what she had said and looked at me pleadingly.

"Oh Quinn, I... I... didn't want to, I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! It's just... he made me angry and I..."

I made a sign with my hand to stop her. "Look Rachel, you're right. That's none of my business." I replied sadly, not even looking at her.

A heavy silence fell between us and became unpleasant with each passing minute.

**IIIIIIIII**

The rest of the day passed without me and Rachel changing many words, just the basics. I was sad about the way she had treated me earlier because of him and she was irritated for some reason unknown to me. Monday came soon and I headed to the supermarket, relieved to be able to leave Rachel's house for a bit; relieved to be able to breathe fresh air, or even take a step without being teased by Rachel saying that I would die if it didn't follow her advice. Sometimes she could be too dramatic.

I spent the day working and noticed that Mr. Hummel didn't want to give me more heavy work, and this has to be Rachel's doing because I knew how much Mr. Hummel liked her and how easily he gave in to her requests. My wound was healing slowly and Rachel said that the process would be a bit time consuming because of the infection. Even with the tension between us, Rachel still took care of me at night before sleeping on the mattress. She had improvised on her room's floor to always have an eye on me.

The other day I was distracted at the vegetable's department replacing the stock of carrots when I saw a red hair coming towards me. At first I didn't recognize, but as she approached the recognition was present in me. That was Mrs. Schuester pushing a shopping cart half full and beside her stood a tall, blond man with curly hair that I deduced to be her husband. They approached me and I saw her smiling.

"Quinn! It's god to see you again! "She said grinning at me.

"I say the same, Mrs. Schuester." I replied cordially.

"You work here now? What about your aunt Holly? Did you managed to find her?"

"Yes, I'm working here. And yes, I managed to find her." I said short and fast, mentioning the name of that woman made me feel angry.

"Oh, that's good honey. Quinn, this is my husband Will Schuester, and Will, this is the girl I told you about the other day, remember?" He waved to her and greeted me friendly, moving away slightly towards the tools department. "Good thing I found you, Quinn." She smiled.

"Why Mrs. Schuester?" I asked curiously.

"Because a few days ago I received a correspondence I presumed that was yours because it was written To: Quinn Fabray and I didn't know where to find you to deliver it. I think there was a mistake in the post office and the letter came to the old address of your aunt, and as I didn't know where Holly was I didn't sent it. I decided to wait and hope to see if I crossed with you again to give you; and here we are."

"Yes... It must have been a mistake anyway." I commented curious. From who would be the letter?

"Well... mistake or not, here it is." She opened her purse and pulled out an envelope from inside. I was looking at her curiously until she caught my glance. "Do not look at me like that; it was in case I crossed paths with you that I was walking with him up and down. Will's idea."

"Thank you for saving it for me, Mrs. Schuester." I thanked her grabbing the letter. The first thing I noticed on it was the seal of the American army. I closed my face, I had a brief idea of what it was.

"No problem, Quinn. Well, I'm going now. Have a good day!" She waved at me and disappeared in the same direction of her husband.

I stared at the letter in my hands and was struggling internally whether to open it there or not. I chose the second option and saved it in the pocket of the robe I wore. If it were bad news, what good would it be reading it now or later? It wouldn't make much of a difference and I would need peace and quiet to read it; two things that I could only have at Rachel's house.

The day was dragging and when I finally got home Rachel had already started make dinner. I helped her in what I could before I went to take a bath. She then changed my bandage and we went to dinner. We talked about superficial things and Rachel told me she had already begun to make her wedding dress. Touching this matter reminded me that in less than a month and a half, Rachel would be marrying Finn Hudson in the small church of Lima. We finished dinner without exchanging many words, lately it seemed that Rachel was avoiding me and I was doing the same thing. So when we went to sleep, I waited Rachel fall asleep to open the letter and start reading.

I barely blinked when I finished reading the content of the letter. They were calling me again and this time it was for Japan. The letter was short and objective, it said that the army was in need of the greatest possible number of soldiers and that everyone were indispensable. I've been hearing some rumors since Germany of a possible nuclear attack on Japan, but the letter only served to confirm the truth. And for sheer irony of fate, the departure date coincided exactly with the date of Rachel's marriage. That was the only really important thing that I noticed in that letter. Rachel's wedding date. And then the tears came softly, stifled and painfully. I finally admitted to myself:

I was completely in love with Rachel Berry.

Didn't know how, at the moment or why. Only that I was and that was my only certainty at the moment. The other was that it wouldn't be easy to let her go.

Then, my sobs became more intense and I clinched the mattress, clutching in my hands Frannie's necklace.


End file.
